This is part of series I'm writing on forgiveness and what it means. Check back in the coming days for the next parts!
In one of my journalism classes we have been discussing a lot about the conflicts that happen in other countries and how so many of them are based off of things that people in those countries feel are historical wrongs. Basically, anytime they get asked why they hate that country or that group it's because 90 years ago they did this to us.
Now doesn't that just seem silly? I guess the problem is that there is no set place to draw the line of when something is just "in the past."
This got me thinking that not only do countries and groups do this but people do this in relationships so much. Getting hung up on the past can be extremely detrimental to moving forward. My professor put it really well, "If you keep dewelling on the past how can you ever have peace?"
While he clearly meant peace in conflicts I think peace can also mean in a relationship. How can the fighting end unless someone lets go of the past? The truth is it probably can't.
I'm not a person to hold a grudge really but my former boyfriend could hold one better than any girl I know. If I did something wrong I would get reminded of it over and over and over. The thing was that it didn't change what I did. It didn't make either of us feel better about ourselves or our relationship.
I do think that their are certain things that maybe we can't "get over" or forgive. But if you find yourself experiencing one of those things in your relationship than maybe you should rethink it.
What I'm basically getting at is that while we should never let ourselves be pushovers we also shouldn't let the past stand in the way of our future and our potential. Getting upset about something is ok just don't let their wrong control your life.
Hmmm... this is going to get even more in depth tomorrow!
As Always, Stay Classy