The Hometown Blues: Getting Back to Normal

I apologize for the lack of posts recently, crazy (wonderful!!!) things have been happening. I will begin posting regularly once a week from now on. 

When I say "going back" I don't mean returning to Argentina, rather I'm talking about going back to the life I had before Argentina. I knew that studying abroad changed you and you would experience reverse culture shock when you got home, but I just didn't expect it to be like... this.

Exciting things like this munchkin! 

I thought that when I came back after studying abroad life would be exactly as it was before I left. For the most part, that is true. Things haven't changed all that much, but I have. It's like I'm looking at everything through different colored glasses now and it's familiar but slightly different.

The biggest challenge by far is dealing with the sense that my life is now boring. In Argentina, to be honest, I didn't feel like it was really all that exciting. Sure hoping a bus to go hike in the mountains for the weekend or hang out on the beach was no big deal. It became so normal that it didn't seem adventurous at the time. Now confined to everyday life of school, work, watching TV it seems like none of that can bring you the same rush as your adventures abroad.

Part of my problem also was that I was home for a good month and a half with no job and no one to spend time with during the day because everyone had jobs or school or their lives to carry on with. Winter breaks have always been rough for me, with the lack of structure and the feeling of isolation from your friends that have become a part of your daily routine.

I found myself in a major funk. I knew that I had friends I could have called to do stuff with. I had places I could have gone to visit if I had tried. In reality, I brought the boredom on myself. That "funk" creates a feeling of hopelessness about everything which prevents you from seeing clearly. Thankfully though I've managed to finally shake it off.

My dog Jazzy helped give me a sense of purpose. 

Going through this odd period after returning home, I think I can see what I did wrong and what would have really helped me readjust without having to feel depressed. So here is my advice to you whenever making any life transition, whether it be returning from travel or graduating school or leaving a job.

• Wake Up: When you have nothing to do for the day, it's easy to just sleep it all away until the early hours of the afternoon. Even though you can, don't. Force yourself to wake up at reasonable time everyday to help keep you from turning into a potato. 

• Dress Up: This one sort of falls into faking it till you make it. Getting dressed and doing whatever normal routines you would usually do (make-up, styling your hair, etc.) helps you keep that normalcy also and will make sure that you are ready if the opportunity for an adventure does arise. 

• Busy Yourself: Find something to do, anything at all. The 6 week or so period that I was at home was such a random amount of time I couldn't really do any work. But don't let that stop you. Find something to do, even if it's just volunteering to walk your neighbors' dog every day at a certain time. Having a purpose will motivate you to do other things. 

• Plan Adventures: One of the biggest things I learned in Argentina was independence and how little I had explored my own home. Let those things apply still after you get off the plane and check out new things nearby, even if you have to do it solo. 

• Ask for Help: I think this one is the most important of all. Don't bottle up your feelings because you're embarrassed. Let your friends and family know if you're not quite feeling like yourself. They're good to vent to and will also help get you back into a routine. 

While I was ready for experiencing culture shock going to Argentina, I was not prepared for the hole in my heart leaving would create. The turning point for me was getting a dog and a brand new beautiful niece that both gave me a sense of purpose I had been lacking. But don't wait for some life changing event to knock you out of a weird mood. 

I learned abroad to be independent and adventurous and to constantly challenge myself with things I never thought I could do. I just momentarily forgot all of that when I stepped off the plane. But now I know better for my next trip! 

XOXO,

Hayley 

The Culture Shock is Real

Today marks leaving home exactly a week ago. Up until now everything, well besides that whole airport fiasco, has been terrific. I love Buenos Aires. I love the people. I love the Spanish. That is until today when I had a minor moment. Tears were almost shed, but I managed to keep it together.

I was in this cafe 2 blocks down from my house. Being confident in my ability to order stuff now I thought I would chill out there and have some hot tea, because that's what you do for 70% of your day in Argentina, no joke.

At first I wasn't sure if you ordered at the counter or sat down and were waited on. After awkwardly standing there a minute or two, I just sat down. When the waitress came over I said, "Me gustaria te, por favor." And she just stared at me. So I repeated it. Then she said something in Spanish and brought over another waiter and handed me a menu. It seemed like either tea wasn't an option or she didn't know what I was saying but I assumed that meant I should order something else.

I couldn't read anything, but I recognized dulce de leche and just pointed at the thing that said that on the menu. Then I impulsively ordered a caramel brownie because that's what I do when I feel uncomfortable. Seriously, I have bought so much crap because I was nervous and didn't know what I was agreeing too.

That dark deliciousness at the bottom is dulce de leche.

So I ended up with a cappuccino (I don't like anything coffee so that was no bueno) and a huge caramel brownie with whip cream on top and chocolate drizzled over it. It looked delicious and the cappuccino at least came with a stick of milk chocolate and a small chocolate biscotti thing, the LOVE their chocolate here. At this point in the story you think, oh good the that's not so bad.

And it wasn't until I realized I dipped a large portion of my hair directly into the chocolate drizzle which then dripped all over my sweater and my pants. At which point it dawned on me that I couldn't even laugh about it with the waitress because I couldn't explain what had happened.

I can honestly say that the most painful feeling in the world is the inability to communicate with others. Thank God this is something I can fix because it's hell to not be understood by anyone! If you know me, you know that talking is my favorite thing to do. I love to tell stories and jokes and a major part of my personality is missing when I lose the ability to do that.

It occurred to me that I am stuck here in a foreign country for the next 4 months. Even though it's not so long, at that moment it seemed like a pretty damn long time.

I thought maybe I go lucky and had bypassed culture shock because I had made it a week with feeling perfectly at home, but it sneaks right up on you. The comforting part is that it will pass. This feeling isn't forever and it happens to everyone.

My new, more pickpocket proof (hopefully) purse.

                                            

On the bright side, though some retail therapy made my day a little better and they even threw in some candy with my purchase!

Notice the adorable little hearts

                                              

So if and when you experience culture shock, it's okay. It sucks, but it happens to all of us and we handle it in different ways but you'll make it through. Even writing this has made me feel 100 times better!



Besos,

The First 24

This is being posted a day late due to my lack of wi-fi at the original host family house. 

Hola! I’ve survived my first 24 hours in Buenos Aires, quite splendidly actually and all without even a single tear! I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I thought it would be harder/scarier than this. Sure I’ve given many a person the deer in the headlights stare, but it’s been easier than I expected it to be.

People have always told me, about going abroad, that people will know English, which may be true if you go to tourist areas. But I am living in Belgrano soon to move to Palermo which are both residential barrios (neighborhoods).       Tourists typically do not venture out this far so me expecting them to know English is just like if we were expected to know Spanish everywhere we went in the US.

What I’ve figured out is that I should expect just as many people to understand English as people that would understand Spanish in just a regular neighborhood in the US. So not very many people. They seem to know a couple basic words (sometimes). Like everyone on the subway said excuse me instead of saying it in Spanish after they heard me talking to another student in English.

You don’t realize how often you say words like okay and yes automatically without thinking about it. It’s been challenging to force myself to say bien and si instead of English. Though I don’t know very much Spanish at all, muy basico, I have been trying to use those few words as frequently as possible to at least get used to saying them.

The city is very interesting. It’s huge and everyone drives like a maniac. There are no real road rules like stop signs or lights or staying in your lane or tailgating. People kind of just do what they want and honk whenever they can’t. It’s a little scary crossing the street, but I’m sort of catching on.

There is also graffiti EVERYWHERE, even though we’re in a nice barrio. It’s kind of weird. Plus people don’t pick up after their dogs, which is definitely gross.

Today I ordered my first dulce de leche all by myself (well with my friend Crystal telling me what to say right before) but I was pretty proud. By the way, dulce de leche is the most amazing thing I’ve ever had in my whole life. I also exchanged money, in Spanish, by myself (no one can come up with you).

Overall though BA is wonderful and I think I’m going to learn fast because no one speaks English and dinner and breakfast are conducted only in Spanish.

To all of mi familia y amigos reading this I love you!