In my case it was a guy that I was talking to then decided I didn't have any romantic interest in. I let him know this and thought that our communication would just end there. I was very very wrong. The last text I sent him was in January saying that "Yes, I would like you to stop talking to me." He since then has still texts me to this day with no answer. Whether it be hey, hi, hello, why aren't you talking to me, this guy just isn't getting that NO means NO!!
But this phenomena is not happening just to me. Below are some screen shots that were sent to the @WhyYouHateGuys twitter account of guys that also couldn't take a hint. Enjoy.
Not only are these desperate attempts annoying and pathetic they show a break down of what no means. Which is caused by a lack of respect on both sides. Respect for themselves and respect for the girl's wishes to not talk to this person.
Now hang on because we are about to get serious here. While these unwanted messages may be fun to read they represent a much more frightening problem. If a guy can't understand that you don't want to talk to him what else does he have a problem understanding?
I think that if someone can't respect you saying NO I don't want to talk to you they probably will also have a hard time listening to NO I don't want to go into that room with you and no I don't want to do anything with you.
Not to say that these guys are or will ever cross the boundary into physically violating someone but they are willing to do it verbally.
According to Human Rights Watch rape has increased significantly over the past years in the United States and I think it has a direct correlation with that fact that people no longer respect boundaries.
So I'm not saying that every guy that can't take a hint is a rapist but they do show an obvious lack of respect for you and your feelings so be wary of what else they won't respect.
I guess to answer the question does NO still mean NO the answer really is no. It doesn't any more. But we can change that by surrounding ourselves with people that respect us enough to respect NO.
PS. Check out his Twitter every Tuesday for funny things like this or search the hash tag #TrashYourExTuesday
It is kind of scary that those guys don't get no!
ReplyDeleteI mean how hard can it be?! I hope that the guy texting you gets the point and starts leaving you alone.
Another spectacular post, Hayley!
ReplyDeleteCommunication technology and social networking have their pros and cons and being a mother of 2 girls, I do worry constantly about what they'll have to deal with in their futures. My 8 year old has asked for a cellphone on multiple occasions (I say "no" every time) and she had even asked if she could sign up for Facebook - a definite NO!
Thanks for writing about this important issue, I hope my girls will be as smart and witty as you are as they get older so they won't ever let themselves get stuck in a bad situation with someone who won't take no for an answer.
♥ Duckie.
http://frikkenduckie.blogspot.com
Great post!! Excellent point-well made!!
ReplyDeleteHappy Spring Hayley!